Everything and Nothing Has Changed (Brad's Story)
Hey yall.
I'm not quite sure what this post will turn into, but one of my goals is to post a blog every Tuesday, so lets see where the wind takes us.
Did you all survive the weekend? Around here, our weekend started out with SNOW! Just as the kids were getting out of school it was snowing! Of course by the time I made my round to pick everyone up and we got home, the snow was pretty much over, and there wasn't enough to play in, but it was pretty while it lasted and it made my boy so so happy. When we got home, we went out to investigate everything and to see what changed when it snowed.
Speaking of my boy, I haven't really written much about him. He is 10 now, and since PreK we knew there was something slightly different with him. He was diagnosed with ADHD in Kindergarten, and I got the general backlash about how he's too young, he's just a boy, he'll grow out of it, he shouldn't be on medicine, he's just like the other kids, let him be a kid.... it was one of the hardest decisions I had to make, because I didn't want my baby to be on medicine either. We had to change his medicines and dosages a few times because B was starting to show signs of true depression. Zombie like behavior, with negative talk about how he hates his life and wish he weren't here. From my 7 year old. It was heartbreaking. By the time he got to 1st grade, Momma was doing her own internet research, because I knew there was something more going on. Things that I thought were just quirks in him were common among another group of children... children on the spectrum. Autism has kind of been a buzz word in recent years. There has been an uprising in awareness, which is incredible. It is also leading to more and more people being diagnosed. My fear was always that I was forcing a label onto him, but that it was not the right label. I wanted answers, but I didn't just want to give it a name so we could "have it all figured out." I spoke with his teacher, who also saw different behaviors that were kind of unexplained. I told her my thoughts about his having high functioning Autism (formerly known as Aspergers). We both started to do a little more research to find ways to help him be successful in the classroom, and while doing that the signs seemed to be so clear. This is what we think it going on.
I requested that the school have him observed by their psychiatrist to see what he thought, and was told that he would come out, observe Bradley and let me know what his opinion was. I also met with his pediatrician. When Brad started his medicine in Kindergarten, he had to start monthly check ups to see how he is doing and we can refill or adjust as needed. I talked to her about the signs and concerns I had with him, and she ordered him to undergo testing to see what's going on. We talked to Children's and they told us it was a 6-9 month waiting list to get an appointment. Like I said, the increase in awareness is leading to more diagnoses, and they just didn't have the staff to keep up with it.
So now its a waiting game. B finishes 1st grade with average good grades. He even made the A honor roll one of the 6 weeks! And now its time to start 2nd grade. At meet the teacher night, I tell his new teacher very vaguely some of his struggles. Focus, social skills, being messy. She's been a teacher for years and has had a variety of students, so its nothing she can't handle. School starts and after having him in the classroom for a little while, we meet to talk about Brad. I tell her my suspected issue of Aspergers, and just like his teacher the year before, she starts research and a quest of how to make his classroom experience more compatible to his needs. Accommodations are made, unofficially, and Bradley, again is successful in completing the grade. There were a few more medicine changes and dosage changes, this year. One of his meds made his chest hurt, and he explained it as his heart beating too fast and he couldn't breathe. Scary stuff...
At the end of 2nd grade, I meet with his teacher and an administrator. Bradley is moving on to 3rd grade, which means STAAR testing. What can we do to help him be the most successful. At this point its been past 6-9 months and still no call from Children's. Is there a way the school can test him to see if there is something more going on? They say they have to have him observed again before they can do anything more. So I say, yes, lets do it. Lets get the process going.
Now my boy is going into 3rd grade. And pretty much everyone in the school knows who he is. He is such a loveable kid, but he always needs extra attention and redirection, and every once in a while has a full on meltdown for unexplained reasons. The year starts, we kind of wait and see how he does with all the transitions of being in a new room with a new teachers, and switching classes. Still no word from Children's after multiple messages left. I meet with his teacher, and again we form plan for him to be successful and to make school and positive, happy place him. his medicine seems to be working, mostly, for keeping him focused enough to maintain passing grades. He is reading at a much higher level than expected and can tell you a million facts about his favorite video games. He seems to be friendly with everyone, and calls everyone his best friends, but doesn't have any friends outside of school, other than the kids he has grown up with. No friendships he has created on his own. When it came to STAAR test time, they were going to see how he did with the practice testing and go from there. When he did good enough, they said he was going to take the test like everyone else. And surprisingly enough, when the results came back over the summer, he did very well on the reading and almost passed the math, was just under the needed score.
All these things have me second guessing my "push" for testing. If he is doing well enough in school to pass, and he has friends that he feels comfortable with, then why push it. But I knew that it was my job as his Mom to be his advocate.
He is now in a whole new school, he has moved up to the intermediate school. More personal responsibility, harder works and testing, and more social issues he has to face. It becomes more and more prominent every year that Brad is different. As the kids around him start to grow up, and he seems behind. I reached out to his doctor again to ask what in the world was going on with Children's, and as fate would have it.... our paperwork got lost somewhere. We had been waiting for 3 years for an appointment that was never going to come. Everything was resubmitted, and we finally got the call. Only to find, none of their doctors took our insurance. really.....
We were referred to a private place called Jewish Family Service. They scheduled us for an appointment that was 2 months away, and apologized that we were going to have to wait so long. I almost laughed at the comment, if only she knew how long we had been waiting for this appointment.
In September, they got to meet Bradley. He bonded with the doctor, and she observed him playing with trains while we talked about his history. He told her about how he perceives things, and at the end of the meeting, we scheduled his testing day.
In November, Brad got to miss school and eat a McGriddle. That was what he was so excited about that day. It was the day of testing. After almost 4 years, my baby was being tested to see what was going on. I soon would have answers. After a full day of testing, of sitting in the waiting area finding things to keep me busy while my boy was undergoing multiple tests, she brings him out around 4, tells me they are done, that he did a great job overall, and that we will meet again in January to go over all the results.
2017. We started this journey the year he started school. PreK 4. 2012. I've cried at an ADHD diagnosis. Cried at different medicines and what they have done to change my baby. Cried while getting him to just simply write his name. Cringed at the thought of changing a plan because sometimes things change. Given him extra time on his iPad because I don't want to incur the meltdown that comes after. Years and years of figuring out what is going on with my baby and doing the best I can to make life manageable for him. And its finally the day that I get answers.
On January 4, 2017, I received Bradley's full diagnosis. Autism spectrum, level 1, which means high functioning. (used to be knows as Aspergers)
ADHD
Learning disability in writing and in math.
Answers. Suddenly everything has changed. And nothing has changed at all.
I get papers telling me all of his suggested accommodations at school, recommendation for a sleep study. Signs to watch for with seizures, because a percentage of children on the spectrum have these seizures that just look like they are spacing out. We have to start one on one therapy for him to talk to someone and hopefully learn some tools he can use to cope. Look into social skills groups for kids his age with similar issues, so they can learn how to be appropriate in social settings...
So much. And then I get home, pick my kiddos up. And he's just Brad. The same baby I rocked to sleep, the same baby with the big blue eyes and dimples for days. The same toddler who loved Toy Story and trains. The same preschooler who played tball and hated to run. The same kid who is so tech savvy and loves to draw and will tell you like he sees it. Who scored a goal on the soccer team and my heart soared, as did his. Who won the reading award over all the 2nd grade. Who started the Investigators club and has a shelf full of clues. Who went on his first campout without Mom and Dad this past Fall. Genuine, loving, sensitive, smart, Bubby. My first born.
We got this, ChuChi Face.
I'm not quite sure what this post will turn into, but one of my goals is to post a blog every Tuesday, so lets see where the wind takes us.
Did you all survive the weekend? Around here, our weekend started out with SNOW! Just as the kids were getting out of school it was snowing! Of course by the time I made my round to pick everyone up and we got home, the snow was pretty much over, and there wasn't enough to play in, but it was pretty while it lasted and it made my boy so so happy. When we got home, we went out to investigate everything and to see what changed when it snowed.
Speaking of my boy, I haven't really written much about him. He is 10 now, and since PreK we knew there was something slightly different with him. He was diagnosed with ADHD in Kindergarten, and I got the general backlash about how he's too young, he's just a boy, he'll grow out of it, he shouldn't be on medicine, he's just like the other kids, let him be a kid.... it was one of the hardest decisions I had to make, because I didn't want my baby to be on medicine either. We had to change his medicines and dosages a few times because B was starting to show signs of true depression. Zombie like behavior, with negative talk about how he hates his life and wish he weren't here. From my 7 year old. It was heartbreaking. By the time he got to 1st grade, Momma was doing her own internet research, because I knew there was something more going on. Things that I thought were just quirks in him were common among another group of children... children on the spectrum. Autism has kind of been a buzz word in recent years. There has been an uprising in awareness, which is incredible. It is also leading to more and more people being diagnosed. My fear was always that I was forcing a label onto him, but that it was not the right label. I wanted answers, but I didn't just want to give it a name so we could "have it all figured out." I spoke with his teacher, who also saw different behaviors that were kind of unexplained. I told her my thoughts about his having high functioning Autism (formerly known as Aspergers). We both started to do a little more research to find ways to help him be successful in the classroom, and while doing that the signs seemed to be so clear. This is what we think it going on.
I requested that the school have him observed by their psychiatrist to see what he thought, and was told that he would come out, observe Bradley and let me know what his opinion was. I also met with his pediatrician. When Brad started his medicine in Kindergarten, he had to start monthly check ups to see how he is doing and we can refill or adjust as needed. I talked to her about the signs and concerns I had with him, and she ordered him to undergo testing to see what's going on. We talked to Children's and they told us it was a 6-9 month waiting list to get an appointment. Like I said, the increase in awareness is leading to more diagnoses, and they just didn't have the staff to keep up with it.
So now its a waiting game. B finishes 1st grade with average good grades. He even made the A honor roll one of the 6 weeks! And now its time to start 2nd grade. At meet the teacher night, I tell his new teacher very vaguely some of his struggles. Focus, social skills, being messy. She's been a teacher for years and has had a variety of students, so its nothing she can't handle. School starts and after having him in the classroom for a little while, we meet to talk about Brad. I tell her my suspected issue of Aspergers, and just like his teacher the year before, she starts research and a quest of how to make his classroom experience more compatible to his needs. Accommodations are made, unofficially, and Bradley, again is successful in completing the grade. There were a few more medicine changes and dosage changes, this year. One of his meds made his chest hurt, and he explained it as his heart beating too fast and he couldn't breathe. Scary stuff...
At the end of 2nd grade, I meet with his teacher and an administrator. Bradley is moving on to 3rd grade, which means STAAR testing. What can we do to help him be the most successful. At this point its been past 6-9 months and still no call from Children's. Is there a way the school can test him to see if there is something more going on? They say they have to have him observed again before they can do anything more. So I say, yes, lets do it. Lets get the process going.
Now my boy is going into 3rd grade. And pretty much everyone in the school knows who he is. He is such a loveable kid, but he always needs extra attention and redirection, and every once in a while has a full on meltdown for unexplained reasons. The year starts, we kind of wait and see how he does with all the transitions of being in a new room with a new teachers, and switching classes. Still no word from Children's after multiple messages left. I meet with his teacher, and again we form plan for him to be successful and to make school and positive, happy place him. his medicine seems to be working, mostly, for keeping him focused enough to maintain passing grades. He is reading at a much higher level than expected and can tell you a million facts about his favorite video games. He seems to be friendly with everyone, and calls everyone his best friends, but doesn't have any friends outside of school, other than the kids he has grown up with. No friendships he has created on his own. When it came to STAAR test time, they were going to see how he did with the practice testing and go from there. When he did good enough, they said he was going to take the test like everyone else. And surprisingly enough, when the results came back over the summer, he did very well on the reading and almost passed the math, was just under the needed score.
All these things have me second guessing my "push" for testing. If he is doing well enough in school to pass, and he has friends that he feels comfortable with, then why push it. But I knew that it was my job as his Mom to be his advocate.
He is now in a whole new school, he has moved up to the intermediate school. More personal responsibility, harder works and testing, and more social issues he has to face. It becomes more and more prominent every year that Brad is different. As the kids around him start to grow up, and he seems behind. I reached out to his doctor again to ask what in the world was going on with Children's, and as fate would have it.... our paperwork got lost somewhere. We had been waiting for 3 years for an appointment that was never going to come. Everything was resubmitted, and we finally got the call. Only to find, none of their doctors took our insurance. really.....
We were referred to a private place called Jewish Family Service. They scheduled us for an appointment that was 2 months away, and apologized that we were going to have to wait so long. I almost laughed at the comment, if only she knew how long we had been waiting for this appointment.
In September, they got to meet Bradley. He bonded with the doctor, and she observed him playing with trains while we talked about his history. He told her about how he perceives things, and at the end of the meeting, we scheduled his testing day.
In November, Brad got to miss school and eat a McGriddle. That was what he was so excited about that day. It was the day of testing. After almost 4 years, my baby was being tested to see what was going on. I soon would have answers. After a full day of testing, of sitting in the waiting area finding things to keep me busy while my boy was undergoing multiple tests, she brings him out around 4, tells me they are done, that he did a great job overall, and that we will meet again in January to go over all the results.
2017. We started this journey the year he started school. PreK 4. 2012. I've cried at an ADHD diagnosis. Cried at different medicines and what they have done to change my baby. Cried while getting him to just simply write his name. Cringed at the thought of changing a plan because sometimes things change. Given him extra time on his iPad because I don't want to incur the meltdown that comes after. Years and years of figuring out what is going on with my baby and doing the best I can to make life manageable for him. And its finally the day that I get answers.
On January 4, 2017, I received Bradley's full diagnosis. Autism spectrum, level 1, which means high functioning. (used to be knows as Aspergers)
ADHD
Learning disability in writing and in math.
Answers. Suddenly everything has changed. And nothing has changed at all.
I get papers telling me all of his suggested accommodations at school, recommendation for a sleep study. Signs to watch for with seizures, because a percentage of children on the spectrum have these seizures that just look like they are spacing out. We have to start one on one therapy for him to talk to someone and hopefully learn some tools he can use to cope. Look into social skills groups for kids his age with similar issues, so they can learn how to be appropriate in social settings...
So much. And then I get home, pick my kiddos up. And he's just Brad. The same baby I rocked to sleep, the same baby with the big blue eyes and dimples for days. The same toddler who loved Toy Story and trains. The same preschooler who played tball and hated to run. The same kid who is so tech savvy and loves to draw and will tell you like he sees it. Who scored a goal on the soccer team and my heart soared, as did his. Who won the reading award over all the 2nd grade. Who started the Investigators club and has a shelf full of clues. Who went on his first campout without Mom and Dad this past Fall. Genuine, loving, sensitive, smart, Bubby. My first born.
We got this, ChuChi Face.
You are such a wonderful mom! Of course...this made me cry! I love your boy and I'm so thrilled that he loves me too!
ReplyDeleteLove this! Love you and your sweet family! So happy Yall finally got the answers yall have been waiting for!
ReplyDelete